An Epitome of Remorse

AN EPITOME OF REMORSE:  

"SHOULD'VE ___"

'When one door closes, another opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us.' - Alexander Graham Bell

The most widely used sentence starts with "I should've ___" The blank is sometimes filled with  'known' or 'done' etc. The funny things about it is that it represents all the three tenses viz Past, Present, Future; yet it is used as a messenger of regret, remorse, guilt etc. It is said in 'Present' about the 'Past' & hence it helps in being cautious in the 'Future'. 

We have to make choices, decisions on which some or the other vital thing of our lives depend on. And these choices aren't always the wise ones! 'Nobody is perfect' which is justified by their decisions. So after making a wrong decision, which everyone does at some point in their lives, we think that things should work out as we intend them to be but as 'Nobody is perfect' hence we're cuffed-up with our own decisions. We regret those decisions in the future which is kind of ironic. The feeling of 'wrong-doing', regret never lets us rest till we confess it or simply accept it. Now a man is full of wishes & hopes and bitterly enough of hubris too so some may even find accepting it to be a difficult cup-of-tea.

The first step towards regret is accepting a decision-gone-wrong. Then comes the time of analyzing the mistakes or loopholes in the decision or deed. Sydney Harris said, "Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable." Sometimes a man thinks it best to do 'nothing' but be a mere spectator whereas on the other hand it draws upon its apocalyptic effect resulting into a poor judgement by the man. The man soon realizes it & here comes the world-famous line 'I should've done something'. Regrets serve no logical purpose other than mental satisfaction but as it has been seen over the course of time, mental satisfaction is the ultimate salvation.

'I should've been there' - represents the self-anger of the person who didn't quite find it apt to be present at a certain event or a life/death occasion.

'I should've done/said something' - indicates the person being handicap to a certain situation in the past which he regrets gratefully in the present.

In both these scenario's, it is clear that the person's carelessness, laziness to act has cost him something precious. The phrase 'I Should've...' is the witness of a person's defeat by none other than himself. He failed to prioritize things  at 'that' prompt time for which he has to pay in the present/future. But the other fact is that a person wakes up pretty late, like directly on the D-Day. Most times it's "too-late" but in some cases people realize it in time.

So for leading a better 'ever-after', a person should look at all the pros/cons with a good temperament. Temperament - here is the most important factor & 95 % people on earth lack it. The person should re-analyze his deeds or decision soon-after & then release the arrow from it's bow. But the buck doesn't stops here. Sometimes we hurt people unknowingly. The person should again introspect, whether the arrow hit the spot or not. A good introspection is the key to living a healthy & wise life. Analyzing our actions from time-to-time molds us in such a manner that we can quickly find the mistake in our actions & it also gives us time to untangle the knot, easily. Remorse is fulfilled with redemption & after a good, just introspection; our instincts solicit our punishment. 

 In the New Testament, Paul says, "Work out your salvation with fear and trembling; for it is God who is at work in you, both to will and to work for His good pleasure."

It is better late than sorry! 'We should do what we must not what we can', if we obey it sincerely there'd be no place for guilt.